All too often, we get wrapped up in our lives to the point where the next thing we know, it’s been 2 months since we’ve last heard from our grandparents, and honestly, that’s sad. Not only does your nana deserve better, but you deserve better too.
Communication is important in every portion of your life, humans are social creatures after all. So why is it that we tend to see talking to our families as ‘childish’ or ‘non-independent’? We aren’t supposed to do it without them.
We need to be connected to the people around us, it’s easy to close yourself off when things get hard, but that’s when you need to reach out the most.
Communication isn’t a one-way street, you can’t just sit there and wait for everyone to reach out to you- It isn’t fair. Instead, you need to put in the work also. Maybe sometimes it isn’t 50/50, maybe you need to reach out a little more often, that’s okay. Sometimes people are busy or sad, or anything else, maybe sometimes people are just bad at communicating. Don’t lose your friends because you’re dying on the hill of perfect fairness.
That being said, don’t be afraid to advocate for yourself. You shouldn’t be the one to initiate 100% of the time, your friends and relatives need to push themselves to remember you too, but that doesn’t mean ignoring them in an eternal game of ‘they need to text me first’.
Being busy is okay, but you can’t always let that be your excuse. It takes 20 seconds to send a text that says ‘I’m busy, can I get back to you later?’ rather than leaving your loved one hanging.
I know the mental effort can be a lot to give a full response when you already have a lot on your plate, but if you truly care about someone, you should really take the time to let them know you saw that they’re reaching out to you.
That being said, when someone is reaching out, take a second to honor
their reply. Maybe you’re not in a great headspace, maybe you literally cannot spare 20 seconds right now. Have the intuition to respond when you can in the way you want to.
Now, not all communication is positive, and that’s okay. One of my personal communication pet peeves is ghosting. Frankly, it takes under a minute to tell someone you don’t want to talk to them anymore. Put your big kid pants on and be honest with the people in your life (assuming they don’t pose an actual threat to your wellbeing, screw those people and drop them like a sack of dog poo).
I think a key part of communicating is being able to tie up your loose ends and take the time to do yourself justice and let people know when they’ve hurt you instead of being just another person who cuts people out without a word. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable and tell someone your honest feelings.
Communication can be as simple, or as complicated as you make it. Either you can be honest, forthcoming, and understanding, or you can spend your mental energy trying to avoid conversations because you don’t want to have them.
Communication is a key part of being human, it prompts us to grow, to love, to cry, and to question, so text your grandma, send a meme to your found family, or finally reply to that friend you accidentally ghosted back in December. We were made to be connected to each other, and you owe it to yourself to let yourself be connected to the people you care about.
